This is my book.
If we can agree on anything, it's that we are not okay. Our culture is reeling from the ravages of a global pandemic, a precipitous rise in depression and anxiety, suffocating debt, white supremacy, hypercapitalism, and a virulent political animus--to name a few.
But what if it's not us? What if it's . . . well, everything? What if trying to conform to a sick culture is actually making us sick?
It's Not You, It's Everything is a timely and incisive inquiry into the anxious pursuit of happiness at all costs. Psychotherapist and former pastor Eric Minton claims that the pernicious melding of capitalism and Christianity means a world of competition, perfection, and scarcity disguised as self-help and self-care. Rather than shaming, silencing, or medicating away our disappointment at not having obtained the happiness we were promised, however, Minton posits a radical alternative. In an impertinent, droll, yet pastoral voice, Minton suggests that our "not-okayness" will require rethinking everything we thought we knew about God, depression, the economy, culture, education, technology, and happiness.
Our angst--and that of our children and teenagers--is telling us the truth about the kind of world we've created. By naming all the ways we're not okay, we move away from fear and shame and toward love, and trust, and trustworthiness. We'll need nothing less than hip-hop, Mr. Rogers, liberation theology, and Jesus to get us there. But on the other side of our pain is a radical "okayness" that might just set us free.
Advance Praise for It’s Not You, It’s Everything
“This penetrating debut by Baptist minister–turned–psychotherapist Minton invites readers to slow down and resist the pressure to be more “popular, marketable, or productive.” To combat “internalized capitalism,” which compels people to feel that they should always be doing more, Minton suggests embracing “radical okayness” and recognizing that one can find fulfillment outside structures of “competition, scarcity, and self-interest.” Minton calls out the engagement-at-all-costs nature of social media, quipping that someone on Instagram will always have done things “better, and with more succulents.” Regarding the intersection of capitalism and religion, he doesn’t mince words: “Self-interest... is the unifying principle of much of what passes for American Christianity these days.” He also derides the “toxically masculine” God of evangelicalism and recasts God as a tolerant and doting parent. Minton’s astute observations about how capitalism drives unending cycles of want (“Discontentment is both capitalism’s oxygen and its carbon dioxide”) succeed in bringing a candid class consciousness to Christian self-help. This unorthodox guide blends humor, theology, and social commentary to potent effect.”
-Publisher’s Weekly
“With It's Not You, It's Everything, Eric Minton gives us a profound gift, inviting us into a genuinely therapeutic space where we can regard our own, stretch-to-the-limit bandwidths with care, compassion, and good humor. He exemplifies this holy task by showing us that all justice is relational and that we ourselves did not create the infrastructures of toxic ideas about self, others, and God many of us have inherited. There is difficult work to be done, but we can meet the task of seeing ourselves clearly & candidly. It can even be a joy.”
-David Dark, Belmont professor of Religion and author of several books, most recently, Life’s Too Short to Pretend You Aren’t Religious
“With a distinctive earthy wit and wisdom, Eric Minton draws upon his pastoral and therapeutic experience with teens and youth to offer hope to us regardless of our age. Challenging us to turn our anxiety and depression back out into the world, he illuminates a path beyond the hypercapitalist morass in which we find ourselves today. I highly recommend this insightful book to caregivers of all stripes, religious or not, and to anyone trying to deal with this crazy world as best as they can.”
-Bruce Rogers-Vaughn, author of Caring for Souls in a Neoliberal Age
“In It’s Not You, It’s Everything, Eric Minton presents a compassionate and uncompromising assessment of the forces driving our spiritual anxiety. Knitting together psychological and structural reasons for a culture engulfed in despair, Eric shows us how the dam of our discontent cannot be plastered over with therapeutic moments and marketplace distractions. It will take stronger stuff to pull apart the blockage of our personal and communal destruction. It’s Not You, It’s Everything guides us towards questions that peel back the source of our discontent. A book for people who can’t take much more, Minton offers us a hope with weight -- hope we can hold on to.”
-Melissa Florer-Bixler, author of How to Have an Enemy